DEMOCRATIC AND AUTHORITIVE STYLES OF EDUCATION
The process of family education is a comprehensive system of parental attitudes aimed at the child. Its goal is to prepare children for independent life in society. Without a doubt, every loving parent feels the burden of responsibility for the future of their own child. He also understands how difficult it can sometimes be to control the process of growing up. If you show excessive softness – the son or daughter ceases to obey. If stiffness, then goes into itself. How to find a middle ground?
Psychologists distinguish four types of relationships between parents and children. Educational systems are scientifically called democratic, authoritarian, indifferent and liberal. Families rarely have a particular style. More often, parents use a combination of techniques that affect the development of children differently. Dictatorship and cooperation are the most likely relationships, according to psychologists.
FAMILY STYLES IN THE FAMILY
To begin, let’s figure out what are the styles of education, and how they affect the development of the child:
Authoritarian parenting style. This parenting style gives parents an unquestioned authority. The advantages of this approach are obedience, undivided control of the actions of the child. But at the same time, these are the main disadvantages of the described style of education. The personal opinion of the younger members of the family becomes useless to anyone, leadership qualities are suppressed, the attitude towards parents takes the form of “subordinate – boss”, almost completely stopping attempts to find spiritual understanding. Children who are raised in such an atmosphere often fear their parents and tend to quickly fly out of their parent’s nest.
Democratic parenting style. This style puts the parent and child on one level, creating trusting relationships between themselves. The child is not afraid to express his own opinion, he feels the support and care of his parents. A democratic style does not imply a complete absence of pressure from mom and dad, but minimizes it, allowing the inner sides of the child’s personality to reveal. Overcoming challenges together helps strengthen family ties and create a creative atmosphere between family members. This approach also has its drawbacks. For example, the fact that as a result of a democratic upbringing, a child can grow up unprepared for harsh reality. Met, for example, with hard work, the army or tough bosses, his character may break.
Democratic and authoritarian style
PECULIARITIES OF THE AUTHORITIES
The authoritarian style of education is characterized by:
demand for high achievements;
punishments for failure;
tight control of personal space, interests, the imposition of developing activities;
prohibitions and threats instead of seeking a compromise.
The listed methods from a 7–8-year-old child can achieve impeccable obedience. In adolescence, parental authority begins to decline. By this time, the consequences of the strictest demands can be formed into complexes expressed:
lack of self-esteem;
inability to make independent decisions;
habit of forceful solutions to contentious issues;
Some methods of an authoritarian style of education must be used in a reasonable form and volume. For example, children should know that certain things cannot be done, but this must be conveyed in the form of instructions, not orders.
FEATURES OF DEMOCRATIC EDUCATION STYLE
Such a conglomerate, useful for the development of children, is distinguished by a democratic parenting style. The main signs and techniques of the relationship:
attitude to the child as a person, respect for his interests;
education under careful and sensitive control;
deep understanding of behavioral motives;
joint choice of continuing education programs;
conditions for the development of creative abilities;
use of dialogue as a means of resolving contentious issues.
If you manage to build such relationships with children, you can proudly share your experience with friends, colleagues and acquaintances. With a high probability, one can expect from a son or daughter an adequate self-esteem, independence, obedience, initiative and determination, the ability to peacefully manage conflicts.
COMBINING BOTH STYLES FOR THE BEST RESULT
Of course, each parent himself chooses the style of parenting, focusing on their own experience and the experience of their mom and dad. Nevertheless, it is never too late to think about whether the system of relations in your family is being built correctly? Separately, both the democratic and the authoritarian style of upbringing have their own shortcomings, which in the future can lead to serious problems. Therefore, the ideal option is a parenting style that will include the best of an authoritarian and democratic style.