WHY CHILD GROWS PAMMERED?
A spoiled child is a misfortune in the family. But we must remember that children are not born greedy, impolite, rude, spoiled – this is how adults bring them up. After all, the kid gets to us clean and innocent, and only then we, as sculptors, sculpt a personality from him, instill different qualities, form a character. And when suddenly in the senior preschool age we realize that somewhere we took a step in the wrong direction in raising the baby, the question immediately arises of how to fix this. Therefore, mom and dad need to remember how not to spoil a child.
Signs of Pampering
To understand the features of your baby, you need to find out the signs of a spoiled child. Here are some of them.
Hysterics. A son or daughter constantly cries and stomps, demanding a new toy or sweets for dinner.
Demanding in food. The kid wants his mother specially for him to cook something special, he refuses to eat what is already ready.
Regular irritation. The child does not like everything that he has. Be it toys, clothes, books.
Hyperbolic greed. Children do not want to share anything with loved ones. The child refuses to give mom a candy from his sweet set or does not allow a friend to play with his typewriter.
Indifference to comments. If the parents ask him to clean the room or help around the house, then the child does not seem to hear their request. The formula “You need it – you do it” comes into play.
how not to spoil a child
Psychologists conducted an analysis and identified at least 10 parental errors, thanks to which the beloved child grows spoiled. If at least two of them are found in your family, this is a signal that you need to change your educational habits as quickly as possible.
The baby is the center of the universe. When you carry out all the whims of the baby on demand, the idea is rooted in his head that the world revolves around him and that his parents do not have their desires. The child will have the bitterness of disappointment if he learns only the “take” function.
Parents do not encourage good behavior. Often busy parents take it for granted when a kid who is keen on a game plays quietly in a nursery. If adults do not say anything, it means that they do not focus on this, make it insignificant.
The peak of parental emotions is due to the poor behavior of the child. If parental emotions arise only when the baby cries hysterically when he rolls around the store floor, begging for a toy, then the child learns the information that this is the only way to get parents’ attention.
Adults do not set boundaries. Culture is a social concept. In this regard, parents instill polite behavior into the child. If adults do not attach importance to such concepts as “respect”, “patience”, with a high degree of probability the baby will grow up being rude.
Inconsistency or lack of rules. For example, yesterday you allowed a child to crumble on a sofa in front of a TV, and today you are repressing for the same behavior. Or when one of the parents adheres to permissive education, and the other establishes vague rules. A similar approach forms an image in the baby’s head about you as not a very important person.
how not to spoil a child
You enter into a pre-losing dispute with a child. It is only logical when you prohibit sweets before dinner. But there are rules that are quite difficult to follow. For example, you make your child eat porridge in the morning. The kid may simply not open his mouth or spit out the contents. The consequence of the defeat goes much further than simply translating the product. The child understands that he can defeat the parent and remain without punishment.
Do not require responsible behavior on the part of the child. If you think that the baby should not be responsible for bad behavior, then argue that any behavior is welcome. The child learns to blame others for his own problems. Better teach your baby to be responsible for his own actions.
Give gifts on demand. There are “wrong” reasons for gifts. For example, a child asks for a new scooter, because he got bored of a couple of months ago. You can’t buy something out of guilt, for example, the baby has caught you in the wrong and asks for a toy. Do not let yourself be manipulated.
Encourage tantrums. When a child has a notion that after hysteria he gets what he wants, in adult life such behavior will have exactly the opposite result. Do not mislead your baby.
Set a bad example. When you complain and whine to third parties in the presence of a child, the child copies your behavior. Then it will be very difficult for him to explain that whining is bad.
how to rehabilitate a spoiled child
We re-educate a spoiled child
Adults need to know how to rehabilitate a spoiled child. There are several rules for this.
Joint behavior. If a mother forbids her son or daughter to watch TV after eating, then dad should support her.
Firm position. The rules that exist in the family should not be changed simply because the child so desires.